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Wednesday, February 7, 2024

Wading Through Sadness

Hey there, friends.  It's been a tough few days around here.  On Sunday night, our beloved Boxer, Finn, died suddenly at the very young age of four.  Last May, he collapsed while on a walk and was diagnosed with a ventricular arrhythmia.  He was immediately put on a beta blocker to treat it in the hope that it would not progress to cardiomyopathy, and by all accounts, the meds were working.  He had another episode five days after the first, while the meds were still getting into his system, and then had not had another episode since. 

Two additional visits to the vet with normal ECG's over the last seven months lulled us into a false sense of relief that we had caught this in its earliest stages before the catastrophic happened.  How wrong we were.  I had fully accepted that his life might not be the 10ish years we expect to get from our dogs, but never in a million years did I think we would lose him at four, and so very suddenly.  We had no warning at all.  One second we were watching a movie and he was sitting right by us in front of the couch, and the next second, he collapsed from sudden heart failure.  He was gone in seconds, despite my futile attempt at CPR. It was very traumatic, and I feel like he has been stolen from me.

These last few days have been a constant battle to keep tears at bay, and if I'm being honest, I've been mostly unsuccessful.  Since I'm home all day, Finn was my constant companion.  He took a nap between my legs on an ottoman in our living room every morning while I drank my coffee.  When I was in my studio, he would drag his special blanket in there just to lay beside me, and when I was cooking in the kitchen, he was never more than a few feet away.  We joked that I couldn’t even shower or use the restroom without supervision.  Every single part of my day included him.  He was so attached to me.  There is an enormous void in my house right now, and I miss him so much that my chest hurts.  We are heartbroken and in a state of shock.

So, NTT is taking a break this week, and instead, here are some pictures of my sweet boy.  Thanks for understanding.







26 comments:

  1. My sincere condolences. Completely understandable. Fur babies are a big part of our family. Hugs and Peace

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  2. Oh, I'm so very sorry. He's a beautiful baby. I'm sure he was loved a lot and knew it. May the Good Lord comfort you.

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  3. Oh, Kelly, I'm so sorry. Finn looks like such a sweet guy. Know that there are lots of us out here thinking about you. Hugs, Diann@LittlePenguinQuilts

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  4. I am so, so sorry for your loss. He was a beautiful dog and clearly devoted to you. He had such soulful eyes.

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  5. So very sorry for your loss. I know no words can ease your pain but, know friends care. He looked to be so gentle and devoted.

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  6. It is not an easy thing to lose our beloved pets. You are so right, they are a part of everything we do. Time will help, but he will always be with you in your thoughts! Tears still happen for me after 7 years, somethings just trigger the memories.

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  7. I am so so sorry for your loss of your constant companion..I hope your lovely memories of him will will your sore heart...hugs, Julierose

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  8. Finn surely had a huge part of your heart! He was so lucky to have you as his mama for the 4 short years he wagged through life. It's so hard to lose a furry friend. Your heart will heal and you will always have such wonderful memories of Finn! Hugs to you!

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  9. So sad to hear about this. I know the pain from when our son's dog died.

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  10. Oof - that is a rough loss, especially so sudden like that. My condolences.

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  11. If you’ve ever had a boxer, you’ll never go back to another breed! My condolences, there will always be an empty spot in your heart, but good memories for you. Jill in Calgary. JillMCCaughey at Shaw dot ca

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  12. How lucky you were to have such a wonderful companion! And how badly you will miss him. So very sorry for you. Pets are so special and hold a special place in our hearts.

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  13. I am so so sorry. I've been thru this several times. Allow yourself to grieve and cry.

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  14. What a beautiful boy!! I’m so very sorry for your loss! It hurts like nothing else!

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  15. I am so sad and sorry to hear about Finn. I delight to know how much he was loved, and I hope that you can remember how much he loved you in return.

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  16. Odd as it may sound, I am glad Finn died suddenly - without pain or suffering. I'm just sorry for the very few years you had with him. As someone who has had multiple pets every day of her 64 years, I know how much joy and comfort they bring, but please remember that you gave the same to Finn. He knew he was loved, and he died happy.

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  17. I am so sorry about your sweet pup. Sending hugs.

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  18. Such a sweet and handsome boy. It's clear from the photos that he was your baby. I'm so sorry for your loss. Take as much time as you need, and don't worry about NTT.

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  19. I’m so sorry for your loss. Losing a pet can be devastating, especially when they are so young. We lost our beloved Tanner last month, and we still cry over him. Like your pup, my pup was a constant companion to myself, and was always by my side unless my husband was home, and then he was my husband’s sidekick. I’ll be thinking of you, as you navigate this journey of grief. It’s definitely not easy.

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  20. How tragic. I'm sending you hugs and prayers as you wade. <3

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  21. So sorry for your loss, our pets are so special to us. We'll be thinking of you often.

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  22. Kelly, my heart goes out to you. What a horrible thing to happen; I'm so very sorry. Thank you for sharing this as well as sharing such perfect but touching photos. I have tears in my eyes as I type this; as a human that has been longtime owned by a few beloved dogs, the day we lose them is the worst day, and to lose him so young...our Staffy/terrier rescue girl was diagnosed with heart disease in January, is on BP meds for it now, three weeks later she tore her ACL, had surgery nine days ago and is currently in a cast. So this strikes close to home... Dogs are just the best; they give so freely of their joy and love, so may all the good times over the four short years you had Finn help you. Sending hugs.

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  23. I am so very sorry. I had to say goodbye to my beloved boxer, Pony, in October. They are just the best dogs. Such cuddle bugs. My sincere condolences.

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  24. Hi Kelly, I'm so sorry for your loss. Our Chevy, a puggle, was my companion for 5 years. I was hoping to retire with her but it didn't work out. Take care of yourself.

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  25. Aww. This makes me teary... I empathize with how you're feeling, and I give you my warmest condolences. May you feel the comfort God gives. Bless you.

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